Things I found in my car while searching for my homework assignment:
1 empty bottle of Red Diamond Sweet Tea
2 Cardinals collector cups
1 eyeshadow compact
1 bra tucked in a Wal-Mart bag (had to make a quick change one day)
1 rain cover for my golf bag
3 pair sunglasses
3 CDs- Alan Jackson, Miranda Lambert, and Abba
2 hair clips
1 sheet of coupons from Krispy Kreme
1 set of iced tea spoons (just picked up at the post office today- my latest eBay purchase)
1 quarter
2 nickels
2 pennies
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Random thoughts
1. I wonder if braces really will help cure my headaches.
2. I wonder why my dental assistant doesn’t see a need to blend her eyeshadow. It looks like she just smears it on in one motion and leaves it.
3. I wonder which planet will be axed next since they demoted Pluto. I’ve always been a bit concerned about Mercury- I mean it’s so small. Does it really deserve to be a planet?
4. I wonder if Kim is making fun of me as she reads this.
5. I wonder how Barnes & Noble can charge extra for 2-3 day “expedited” shipping, but then go on to say that it could be more like 5-6 days before you actually get your book.
6. I wonder where I will hang my diploma when I (hopefully) get it in May.
7. Never mind. It’s going right over my desk.
8. And I’m going to mail a copy to that rude girl at the bank.
9. Why do I always look forward to the start of a new semester, but as soon as it gets here, I can’t wait for it to be over?
10. How come, when I have something I really need to do, I can find so many other things I’d rather be doing? Like blogging??
2. I wonder why my dental assistant doesn’t see a need to blend her eyeshadow. It looks like she just smears it on in one motion and leaves it.
3. I wonder which planet will be axed next since they demoted Pluto. I’ve always been a bit concerned about Mercury- I mean it’s so small. Does it really deserve to be a planet?
4. I wonder if Kim is making fun of me as she reads this.
5. I wonder how Barnes & Noble can charge extra for 2-3 day “expedited” shipping, but then go on to say that it could be more like 5-6 days before you actually get your book.
6. I wonder where I will hang my diploma when I (hopefully) get it in May.
7. Never mind. It’s going right over my desk.
8. And I’m going to mail a copy to that rude girl at the bank.
9. Why do I always look forward to the start of a new semester, but as soon as it gets here, I can’t wait for it to be over?
10. How come, when I have something I really need to do, I can find so many other things I’d rather be doing? Like blogging??
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Bath time
My sweet little cat, Twanger, has terribly sensitive skin. One bite from a flea, or whatever and he starts loosing fur. Unfortunately, he is also allergic to most flea and tick medications, like Advantage and Frontline. We found a spray that he tolerates pretty well, but I think that instead of killing the fleas, they just leave because the spray smells SO BAD. Recently, even the spray hasn’t worked and he is going bald from his tail up his back.
I haven’t seen any fleas on him or in the house, so I wasn’t really sure what to do. Since we are so limited on just what we can use on him, I finally gave up last night and washed the cat. This was a new experience for me. Usually, he just cleans himself as he sees fit and we all just call it good. So I wasn’t sure what to expect when I put him in the tub and started pouring water over him.
He was pretty good at first- just complained a little. I felt so sorry for him as he fought for traction on the slick tub floor and I couldn’t believe how skinny he looked with all of his hair slicked down. He got a bit louder as I lathered him up and when I went to rinse- that’s when all hell broke loose. Even though he could not get traction on the tub, he was somehow able to grab the shower curtain and had climbed halfway up before I could even react. He was still howling at the top of his lungs as he discovered that he was now stuck on the curtain.
It was quite a task getting him down from there and if you have ever had to loose a pissed-off, panicky, soaking wet cat from a shower curtain before, you know exactly what I am talking about. I tried to be gentle, but thanks to those claws, it quickly turned into a grab and toss.
I am still hopeful that he will forgive me and come out from under the couch soon.
I haven’t seen any fleas on him or in the house, so I wasn’t really sure what to do. Since we are so limited on just what we can use on him, I finally gave up last night and washed the cat. This was a new experience for me. Usually, he just cleans himself as he sees fit and we all just call it good. So I wasn’t sure what to expect when I put him in the tub and started pouring water over him.
He was pretty good at first- just complained a little. I felt so sorry for him as he fought for traction on the slick tub floor and I couldn’t believe how skinny he looked with all of his hair slicked down. He got a bit louder as I lathered him up and when I went to rinse- that’s when all hell broke loose. Even though he could not get traction on the tub, he was somehow able to grab the shower curtain and had climbed halfway up before I could even react. He was still howling at the top of his lungs as he discovered that he was now stuck on the curtain.
It was quite a task getting him down from there and if you have ever had to loose a pissed-off, panicky, soaking wet cat from a shower curtain before, you know exactly what I am talking about. I tried to be gentle, but thanks to those claws, it quickly turned into a grab and toss.
I am still hopeful that he will forgive me and come out from under the couch soon.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
More therapy
As pretty much everyone knows, I lost my brother earlier this year. I don't know how long this will last, but sometimes it is still really hard. The following does not reflect the state I am in now, just a place I have been before. I hope that by writing about it, it will lose some of its power.
The descent
Sometimes it sneaks up on me. Other times, I see it coming. There is a tiny voice that lives in my chest, just below my heart, that tells me I’m not good enough. I’m not smart enough, I’m not sophisticated enough, I’m too childish, I’m a bad person. The voice whispers that to me over and over and over, the words filling my chest and squeezing my lungs. I can feel the negativity creeping up each side of my neck, as the voice travels up to whisper in my ears. And I am forced to believe. The voice always has evidence for its claims. “Remember what you said…” “Remember what you did…”
And the color begins to drain from my life. Literally. I begin wearing less make-up. No eye shadow, no blush, no eyeliner. I don’t really do it intentionally, it just happens that way and I don’t notice it’s gone. It has been years since I’ve worn nail polish for any length of time. My clothing changes, my jewelry stays in the box, my hair goes up in a clip. And I pride myself that at least I still shower everyday.
I notice that the people I meet are not friendly and I wonder why they hate me. Do they know me? Do they know something about me? What have I done to them? And so, I try to avoid any contact with people. I don’t call my mom, I don’t call my friends. I dread each time the phone rings because I know the person on the other end will be able to tell how useless I am.
And the words in my chest continue to grow and gain strength. They swell until I can barely breathe and I am sure my heart will stop. And I wish it would. I wish I would just disappear. I see other people walking past me and I wonder if they know the hell I am going through and I hate them if they do. And I hate myself. I feel the weight of the words pulling me down, as if someone were pushing me down from above. I want to sleep. And sometimes I can. And even as I write this, I am afraid to tell exactly what happens for fear it will happen again.
The descent
Sometimes it sneaks up on me. Other times, I see it coming. There is a tiny voice that lives in my chest, just below my heart, that tells me I’m not good enough. I’m not smart enough, I’m not sophisticated enough, I’m too childish, I’m a bad person. The voice whispers that to me over and over and over, the words filling my chest and squeezing my lungs. I can feel the negativity creeping up each side of my neck, as the voice travels up to whisper in my ears. And I am forced to believe. The voice always has evidence for its claims. “Remember what you said…” “Remember what you did…”
And the color begins to drain from my life. Literally. I begin wearing less make-up. No eye shadow, no blush, no eyeliner. I don’t really do it intentionally, it just happens that way and I don’t notice it’s gone. It has been years since I’ve worn nail polish for any length of time. My clothing changes, my jewelry stays in the box, my hair goes up in a clip. And I pride myself that at least I still shower everyday.
I notice that the people I meet are not friendly and I wonder why they hate me. Do they know me? Do they know something about me? What have I done to them? And so, I try to avoid any contact with people. I don’t call my mom, I don’t call my friends. I dread each time the phone rings because I know the person on the other end will be able to tell how useless I am.
And the words in my chest continue to grow and gain strength. They swell until I can barely breathe and I am sure my heart will stop. And I wish it would. I wish I would just disappear. I see other people walking past me and I wonder if they know the hell I am going through and I hate them if they do. And I hate myself. I feel the weight of the words pulling me down, as if someone were pushing me down from above. I want to sleep. And sometimes I can. And even as I write this, I am afraid to tell exactly what happens for fear it will happen again.
Monday, August 07, 2006
Personal Code of Ethics
I had to do this for my ethics class. We had to refer to some theories, but I tried to edit those out
Personal Code of Ethics
I am a person like no other. I will do my best to be the person God created me to be. I will not live my life based on what I think others expect of me, but rather based on what I expect from myself. Although I am far from perfect, I will try to act in such a way that will make my family and my friends proud of me. They are a great source of strength and I will honor them while remaining true to myself.
I will not put on false airs or try to act like someone I’m not. I will present the genuine me. I will practice self-disclosure wisely, and err on the side of too much information. I will trust others until I am given reason to revoke that trust.
I will strive to be a contributing member of society, both professionally and personally. I value education and lifelong learning and will continue to expand my knowledge by attending classes. I also understand the value of work and feel that it is a necessary and constructive part of my life. I will continue to make myself more valuable to my employer by attending seminars and training and by doing my best for the company. I will also continue to seek the answers to the questions occurring in my naturally curious mind. I will lend myself to situations where I will not be monetarily compensated for my work, when it is for a worthwhile cause.
I will strive to help others see their own worth and potential. I believe that every person is on this earth for a reason and that I can learn something from each person I meet throughout my life. Just as each person can have an effect on me, I realize that my words and actions can affect others. I will strive to be courteous and to leave a positive impression on the people I meet. I will try to be pleasant even when the surrounding conditions are not. My situation will not define who I am.
I will share my knowledge and experiences with others who solicit it and with the younger members of my family who need to hear it. After sharing my point of view, I will not try to force anyone into an action that is not consistent with what they believe. I believe that people should think for themselves. I reserve the right to alter any of these viewpoints should I ever be blessed with children of my own. I will be a resource when possible and a sounding board for those in my realm of influence.
I will always try to look at the positive in any given situation and to help others see it too. I will try to be patient with people and try to remember that others may be facing difficult situations in their lives that may leave them overwhelmed and more inclined to be short tempered. I will try to surround myself with other positive people so that we may learn and grow together. I will limit my contact with those whose worldview is dark and pessimistic, lest it be contagious. I will remember that we are all here together and that it is up to each of us to make the best of our situation.
I will remember that laughter is the best medicine. I believe that any time humor can be used to make a situation easier or less stressful, it should be used. I will continue to laugh at myself and to encourage others to laugh with me. I do not mind a joke at my expense if it will help someone else feel more at ease with themselves.
I will be a good listener. I will keep myself open to other viewpoints, even if I disagree with them, for learning what I do not believe will help me define what I do believe. I will not betray the confidences of others and will be truthful with them. I will not expose myself to those whom I know will not give me the same respect and regard.
When faced with an unfamiliar situation with no obvious right or wrong, I will do what I believe a virtuous person would do in that situation. When possible, I will seek them out and ask for their advice. While I may not always make the right decision, I will always try to consider the options before choosing. I do not base my decisions on a categorical imperative, as I believe that few, if any, exist.
I will remember, “With God, all things are possible,” and that I won’t get very far without Him. I will be gracious for all gifts I have been given. I will remember that God wants the best for me, but it is up to me to find it. I will continue to try to do His will and to follow the road he would have me follow.
Personal Code of Ethics
I am a person like no other. I will do my best to be the person God created me to be. I will not live my life based on what I think others expect of me, but rather based on what I expect from myself. Although I am far from perfect, I will try to act in such a way that will make my family and my friends proud of me. They are a great source of strength and I will honor them while remaining true to myself.
I will not put on false airs or try to act like someone I’m not. I will present the genuine me. I will practice self-disclosure wisely, and err on the side of too much information. I will trust others until I am given reason to revoke that trust.
I will strive to be a contributing member of society, both professionally and personally. I value education and lifelong learning and will continue to expand my knowledge by attending classes. I also understand the value of work and feel that it is a necessary and constructive part of my life. I will continue to make myself more valuable to my employer by attending seminars and training and by doing my best for the company. I will also continue to seek the answers to the questions occurring in my naturally curious mind. I will lend myself to situations where I will not be monetarily compensated for my work, when it is for a worthwhile cause.
I will strive to help others see their own worth and potential. I believe that every person is on this earth for a reason and that I can learn something from each person I meet throughout my life. Just as each person can have an effect on me, I realize that my words and actions can affect others. I will strive to be courteous and to leave a positive impression on the people I meet. I will try to be pleasant even when the surrounding conditions are not. My situation will not define who I am.
I will share my knowledge and experiences with others who solicit it and with the younger members of my family who need to hear it. After sharing my point of view, I will not try to force anyone into an action that is not consistent with what they believe. I believe that people should think for themselves. I reserve the right to alter any of these viewpoints should I ever be blessed with children of my own. I will be a resource when possible and a sounding board for those in my realm of influence.
I will always try to look at the positive in any given situation and to help others see it too. I will try to be patient with people and try to remember that others may be facing difficult situations in their lives that may leave them overwhelmed and more inclined to be short tempered. I will try to surround myself with other positive people so that we may learn and grow together. I will limit my contact with those whose worldview is dark and pessimistic, lest it be contagious. I will remember that we are all here together and that it is up to each of us to make the best of our situation.
I will remember that laughter is the best medicine. I believe that any time humor can be used to make a situation easier or less stressful, it should be used. I will continue to laugh at myself and to encourage others to laugh with me. I do not mind a joke at my expense if it will help someone else feel more at ease with themselves.
I will be a good listener. I will keep myself open to other viewpoints, even if I disagree with them, for learning what I do not believe will help me define what I do believe. I will not betray the confidences of others and will be truthful with them. I will not expose myself to those whom I know will not give me the same respect and regard.
When faced with an unfamiliar situation with no obvious right or wrong, I will do what I believe a virtuous person would do in that situation. When possible, I will seek them out and ask for their advice. While I may not always make the right decision, I will always try to consider the options before choosing. I do not base my decisions on a categorical imperative, as I believe that few, if any, exist.
I will remember, “With God, all things are possible,” and that I won’t get very far without Him. I will be gracious for all gifts I have been given. I will remember that God wants the best for me, but it is up to me to find it. I will continue to try to do His will and to follow the road he would have me follow.
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